September 2007

Dear SJSL Parents:

I am writing on behalf of the Executive Board and member clubs of the South Jersey Soccer League to solicit your understanding and support.

Over the last few years, the league has set up systems to monitor the conduct of our players, coaches and spectators. This system, which is based on referee reports and weekly observations by our board members, has shown a positive trend among our players. It is evident they have a better understanding of the rules of the game, the skill level has increased, and just as important, the level of sportsmanship has improved.

I am sorry to have to report, however, there is a disturbing trend in the evaluation of both coaches and spectators. This trend is measured over time and is not the result of just one or two referee reports but by measurement over two to three seasonal periods. We have seen inappropriate conduct exhibited by parents towards players, referees, opposing coaches and parents of the opposing team. The number of cautions and red cards of coaches for parental conduct are up significantly. The actions range from ridicule, to verbal abuse, to physical confrontation. The disturbing part of this is it frequently happens in our younger teams more so than our older teams

For the sake of your child’s experience in organized sport and for the good of the game, it is important that we, as parents, maintain perspective. The perspective is simple. First of all, this experience is a game and secondly, the experience is your child’s and not yours. The overwhelming majority of parents maintain this perspective, while the minority undermines it for those of you who otherwise want to enjoy it.

The laws of the game and the league’s constitution and playing rules allow us to sanction players and coaches. We also have the authority to sanction players, teams and our member clubs for the actions of their parents and spectators. Those sanctions can range from monetary fines, to coaching suspensions (for not maintaining parental control), to reducing game points, to deeming a team ineligible for conference championships. Unfortunately, the trend is such that we are to the point where we have to consider sanctioning for parental conduct as part of our playing rules.

We are imploring you to get this issue under control. For those who maintain the proper perspective, we are appreciative and thankful. You are creating a healthy environment for your child’s development not only in the sport, but also in other facets of life where communication and teamwork are critical to success. But to those of you who prefer to rant and rave at referees, verbally abuse the opposing team and their spectators, and disrespect the game, the tolerance level is waning. And the unfortunate result is your child will eventually suffer for your actions.

If you would like to share your thoughts on this issue, please feel free to email me at sco@jersey.net . We’ll see you on the field and let’s all enjoy this wonderful game.

Scott O’Donnell

President